What I don't understand is why Tante Atie was so opposed to the Mother's Day card from Sophie. Sophie made it with the intention of giving it to her aunt, so I believe her aunt should have accepted it. I believe she was as deserving as any other mother for a card with a flower inside of it.Even if it was her actual mother's favorite flower, a daffodil. Tante Atie had raised Sophie and loved and nurtured her exactly like a mother for her own daughter. Although she always referred to Sophie as "her child" (31). The days leading up to Sophie's departure it was obvious Tante Atie began to mourn over the loss of "her child".
I do believe that Atie strongly believed in the relationship between a mother and daughter and felt that Sophie was never really hers in that type of relationship but probably wanted to. She was unable to have a family of her own because the love of her life married someone else. Maybe it is painful for Atie to think of Sophie as her daughter knowing she will never have one of her flesh and bone. Only her sister's flesh and bone being her daughter. It was refreshing that Atie had always spoke highly of her sister and put the faith in her a being a good mother once Sophie was returned to her, but I think Sophie enjoyed the mere idea of her mother.
I feel her aunt wanted nothing more than to be able to accept it but its hard for her because she always has to have in the back of her mind that she is NOT Sophie's mother and that Sophie will have to leave her. She would feel she is betraying her sister if she accepting it because the agreement was that she would look after Sophie, not become her mother. She acted as violently against it as she did because that's what she needed to do to make herself okay with it. She loves Sophie as a child and it kills her to not be able to consider herself Sophie's mother but she loves and respects her sister too much to allow herself to betray her like that.
ReplyDeleteI think that in many cultures the bond between a mother and a daughter is perceived to be very strong and unbreakable. I think Atie feels like she will be damaging such a powerful bond if she blurs the lines in her and Sophie's relationship. I'm sure if she had her way she would claim Sophie as her own, but tradition and family are so important to her. Also, because Sophie and Martine's relationship is more nontraditional or complicated than some, she probably wants to give Sophie that sense of normalcy that their family has not had for many years. Even though it isn't what she wants, she thinks that's what Sophie needs; my only concern is whether it was the right decision or not.
ReplyDelete